Since the beginning of 2009, I had felt like I was often coming down with the flu, so badly, that I would spend days in bed and take a flu tablet to stop the aches.  It never dawned on me that this could have had anything to do with Crohn's. It became quite debilitating, and I noticed it happened a lot on the week-ends. I put it down to being tired all the time.

At the same time I was also suffering from a painful shoulder. This really bugged me because I have always kept physically fit, and lifting weights has been a part of my life since my early twenties.  Needless to say, the nagging pain in my shoulder started to prevent me from lifting the weights, and then it started to stay with me all day and night.  I presumed I had injured myself with the constant repetition. 

I hate going to the doctor, and it takes a lot to get me to go. However, the shoulder pain became worse, and in the end I gave in and went. After an ultrasound I was told to go and see a specialist. Which I did.  The specialist thougth I had some inflammation due to the weights and prescribed a drug for me.  I hate taking drugs too, but decided I would do this. I must point out here I made it very clear that I had Crohn's and the doctor discussed this issue with me.  Needless to say after months of taking this drug and finally one day deciding to read the leaflet in the packet, I was more than shocked with the bold writing that stated DO NOT TAKE THIS DRUG IF YOU SUFFER FROM CROHN'S DISEASE. Now this really annoyed me because I had also told the Chemist when I had the prescription filled and she also stated there was not an issue with having Crohn's.  This is one of the reasons I hate going to doctors. Sometimes I think they prescribe you these drugs and in the end it causes you another problem, so more drugs and guess what, more profits for all the pharamaceutical companies.

I kept having these bouts of 'flu' and then my shoulder pain started in the other shoulder, and over time I felt that I had arthritis in my whole body. A lot of my joints became inflamed and I became suspicious that Crohn's was flaring up again.

As you may have read in this online book, I have previously beaten Crohn's with the power of my mind and diet. However, over the years I let my diet go and this year especially I was not careful.  I believe with the flu tablets I was taking, the medicine prescribed to me that should not have and my poor diet, my body gave in and Crohn's hit me, and it hit me hard.

No longer was I able to run and exercise the way I used to. I felt like an old lady.  I had more frequent episodes of the 'flu' and once it resulted in me having 8 days off work, I thought I must have had the Swine Flu. And so I continued to struggle, and each day, I had these symptoms:

• Terrible pain in the stomach
• Frequent visits to the toilet
• Shivering (flu like) and body aches
• Extreme fatigue
• Joint pain
• A terrible malaise

I knew something was not right anymore.  At the same time I had just started a new business as one of the directors of a recruitment company and had that stress to deal with too.  One day, I was walking home from the shops and walked by the house of my business partner.  Tanya, (my business partner) had dropped me off at the shops.  Whilst I was at the shops I thought I was going to collapse, I knew that something was very wrong with me, however, I am a stubborn woman and decided I would ignore it and continue. Then I decided to walk the 2km's home.  This is when I passed by Tanya's house and her husband and his brother were out the backyard. I did not look good, and Tanya's brother in law put me in the car and drove me home.

Once at home I rushed to the toilet and was horrified to see how much dark blood passed out of me. Now I was really really worried. I knew I was in trouble and started to cry.

My partner, was on flight back from Melbourne and he rang me to tell me his plane was in an incident and was diverted back to Melbourne so he would be late.  I started to cry and told him what just happened, he insisted I ring the hospital straight away. I resisted as usual, but in the end knew he was right, and did what he told me to do. My call to the emergency room was taken, and the nurse told me to ring an ambulance and come straight up.  I replied with "can't I just walk it's only about a km from where I live".  She replied with, no call an ambulance.  So I called Tanya!

Tanya dropped everything and came over to take me to hospital. However, I was in the middle of organising candidate interviews with one of my clients, so as she was driving over to collect me, she was being bombarded by emails on her Blackberry from me that I had copied her into.  I was emailing client and candidates finalising appointments!  Tanya and I laugh about this, as it was quite amusing at the time. I guess it shows my work ethic though! Not sure what the client thought when he rang me and I told him I was on my way to hospital!

We arrived at the hospital, and Tanya and I have a great culture at work, and we laugh a lot. Even in a crisis we still manage to make each other laugh. As we pulled up to the hospital, she said something that made me laugh, and I can remember saying to her, 'dont' make me look like I am laughing as I walk in here or they won't take me seriously', so we both controlled ourselves, however I did feel awful.

Once we arrived at Triage, the nurse took one look at me and heard my story . She then took me straight through to the emergency room for assessment. After the doctor saw me she said I had go on steroids. Now I have always said I would never do that and I argued with her and argued with her, however she said I would have no side effects as it was just for a month, and she would put me on 30mg.

Tanya stayed with me, and left once it was decided I had to stay in overnight.

When the nurse came and gave me the tablets I cried, but I felt so dreadful so I took them. 

After about an hour the nurse came back and said she would put me in a wheelchair and take me to the ward. I refused the wheelchair and told her I would walk thank you.  My confidence in this particular nurse went downhill very quickly when she asked me what Crohn's Disease was!

Once I arrived at the ward, the station nurse asked the nurse escorting me "where is the patient?" I replied "I am the patient" and everyone laughed as they were not used to having patients walk up themselves - I found out why - they had me in the geriatric ward and I am only in my late 40's!!!!! That's the NSW public hospital system for you.

The next day I was given more steroids and seen by the Registrar and 2 other interns.  It was then I found out I was not on 30mg of Prednisone but 60mg! I freaked out! I told him I would not take anymore. The Registrar insisted that on my release from hospital I would be taking 60mg of this stuff.  I said no, and in the end he rang my specialist who agreed I could leave on 25mg.

Now I have done more than enough research on this medicine. It may suit some people but the side effects to me are too horrendous and I don't want it.  Before my release from hospital I was warned by both doctor and pharmacist that I must not stop the drugs cold turkey.

I took another dose the next day, and then the following day.  By this time, in such a short space, I had started to develop a round face, my stomach felt fat and the fourth day, I became very aggressive and depressed. That's when I decided I would not have any more of this drug.

I booked myself in to see my GP on the following day and told him no matter what, I would no take these any more. He said that I could go off them since it had only been 4 days.  I knew I might get some withdrawal symptoms from stopping them but nothing could have braced me for the night I was about to experience.

I will point out here, the steroids stopped my pain immediately. I had forgotten what it was like to have a pain free body.  I had to choose between my mental health or physical health. Tough choice. I chose my mental health.  So now I had to find a way to get myself better, all alone without doctors. Another reason I chose to stop the steroids was because they only mask the symptoms, they do not cure it, and they have dreadful side effects. If, being on them for a while cured Crohn's I may have considered it. I would also like to point out that the following is my personal opinion, and what works for me may not work for you.  It is also my personal opinion that many drugs cause other problems, hence more money to be made by the pharmaceutical companies.

Getting back to my story, I had really enjoyed my four days of pain free and a normal body, until day 4th of course when I could feel the side effects starting. That night I suffered so badly, I wondered if I wanted to stay alive.  My body shivered, ached and I felt in so much pain. My stomach cramped and I didn't sleep. I woke up and could hardly walk.

However, there was hope. I had started a gluten free diet a week prior to being hospitalised and when I was first diagnosed with Crohn's disease that's how I cured it. If I did it then I could do it again.  I also believe in the power of the mind, and what you focus on you get. So I focused on the diet working and curing my inflamed body.

I told my loved ones to stop worrying and that soon I would be pain free.  I told my partner to 'watch this space' as I would be back to myself soon, however it would take enourmous effort on my part and a very positive mindset.  Did I do it? You bet, after a week I was pain free.

Click on to my next blog entry to see how I did it.  Before you do though, I am not selling you anything, this is written to help you and for no other reason.

All the best on your own journey,

Sincerely

Debbie Carr

Debbie Carr